Issues with modern day Seppuku

The Being 1st generation Japanese-American has brought many troubling issues for me. The one that is outstanding is how my American father sold the swords my ofesan gave to him. So pathetic I don't know where to begin.

Next is that in the USA, it's illegal to behead a person, perhaps even after they bleed out. 

Then, because the United States has so many discrepancies, I would want a clean and understood death. 

I won't even mention that I wanted to commit suicide when I was 9years old. The abuse from the Quakertown community was too much then. I only stayed alive to take the relentless beatings that my brother would have had to endure if I didn't accept blame for his mistakes. Thus, I was beyond upset when they found him dead with his brains blown out with a gun all over the area near where clam bake stove was.

I feel sorry for my mother that she came to the United States at all. 

I grew up with the story of how the white nurses at Quakertown Hospital in 1970 killed my sister after her first breaths and told her 

how she didn't deserve to have children. children. That story was one I heard nearly every night. And as young as I can remember, my mother educated me that the men at my church and school would probably rape me, and how my parents could not afford a lawsuit for such a matter. However, when things got so bad in the USA I was to kill myself, as no one in the family overseas had time to try and solve problems. There are no lawsuits, only war and preferably peace with the Americans. As Japanese I have a duty to the Emporer to exist so that American people meet a little bit of Japan. There were very few Japanese on the east Coast USA living with their families at that time. So I was to represent Japan as well.

Dying a macaroni and cheese death is not something I want in the USA. Tibet helped me through the last round of murder attempts on my life in the east Coast USA.

I have very little in common or that I like of the people I have met in Hawaii. Many are 3-4th generation and are not very classy, missing the Hepburn mark by more than a few republican elephant turds.

List #1- USA SUCKS

A laundry list of How horrible it has been growing up in the USA, then add dating/marriage pressure and trying to maintain peaceful understanding.

1. White/Caucasian men still majority look down on asian & Japanese culture.

2. Most of the American men & women I have met in environmental circles have No remorse for Hiroshima and have no respect for Japanese, especially if they survive from US government funding ie., non-profit organizations, military contractors, military, etc. .

3. Many caucasian environmentalists have a strong anti-nuclear stance in some cases and support the United States having nuclear military power & nuclear reactors (though they will 100% claim it is not acceptable in other parts of the world).

4. Most of the low class try to bring me down to their level.

5. Some of the decent men know that they are admittedly not capable of taking care of me due to who my Japanese relatives are. They do not meet an acceptable social standard.

6. Alot of American men treat me badly (ie., abduction & assault- Eg. when Knight Engineering in Buckingham, PA abducted me to their home because of one of their staff, an empty apartment above a garage I found out and I was assaulted for over a week. No phone, no way to leave until I heard them talking about the neighbors growing suspicious because I wasn't seen leaving. I managed to get to my phone dial 9-11 before my phone battery died completely and call was traced. Police arrived to assist me;- however because of my ethnicity no court proceedings occured and they denied my rights as a human being, I only managed to leave) because they view Asian women (on a whole) as sex toys, not as human beings. This was perhaps the worst public instance of my assault by a prominent community member and his staff to my person. The bigger disadvantage to this is that the caucasian and other communities don't have any pressure from my/her family since they are few in number. Of course the men, not saying the low class, exploit her and disrespect her in the highest forms available and don't give her rights in court to the point of judge in normal case should be disbarred for racism/nationalism.

7. Other men & women of Hawaii, see me and other Asian women as people to exploit due to their use of violence to perpetrate their own ends. Finding that those men are more prone to instigating pimp-like behavior in my life because their own men & communities protect them from legal recourse.

8. My higher class relatives abroad are subject of jealousy for Americans and other Asian peoples in the USA. So, I have been attacked and had my life threatened and nearly killed multiple times because of my relation alone. I have found that most people in the USA have no remorse for Hiroshima. Except for a great-uncle of mine in USA who actually fought at Iwo Jima & cleaned up Pearl Harbor. Most USA patriots are poseurs in their military respect and awareness and choose to hurt me to try and play a role that isn't theirs.